For so long, I wanted my Wow Factor so bad that I was willing to mold someone into him. Then I realized that didn't even make sense. I was trying to bend backward to keep a man I don't even think I respected. I found two good things about them, held on tight to those thoughts, and tried my best to ignore the things I hated.
Lately, though, I started flashing back to the conversations with men I deeply respect. I paid attention to their relationships. I thought about my son and how he treats his wife. I spent time alone looking in my mirror. That mirror is a bitch!
Women don't date anymore! They find men they are attracted to that are giving them attention, and they try to save them. These men become their children. We start caring so much and wanting them to win that we overlook ourselves and what we want. We begin accepting any behavior cause we get stuck on the good things, and we hold on to that. Even though out of 7 traits, only 2 of them are good.
Some men don't care. They are going to screw you over and over again. Sex is sex. They will accept anything you do for them or give them. Why not? Who doesn't want attention and to be catered to? That doesn't mean that they respect you or care. Most don't. Some men are just straight assholes. Some are lazy AF and are always making excuses. They don't even respect themselves. How in the world would you ever expect them to respect you? Walk away from the selfish men! They are nothing but energy-drainers, and they will blame you for everything.
People tell women that we don't need to be picky. Look at what you've been doing and let me know how it's working for you. Show me how it looks when you're not picky and I will hand you your mirror so you can see the sadness in your eyes. Again, you're the problem, not them.
Here's the interesting part, If you begin to pay attention and focus on yourself, the one that moves the way you would like a man to move will take his place. The one that is excited about being in your presence. The one who values everything about you. The one who knows who he is as a man and has taken his time to heal and/or deal with his shit. You only know about it because he is sharing it with you and not using you to get revenge for what others did to him. This man will cater to you and treat you how you deserve to be treated. More importantly, yall can be true friends and express yourselves without judgment.
Do you want another child or a mate? You get to decide.
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